Snippet: Talking to Stranger on a Bus...Transformative!

Snip·pet | ˈsnipit | noun a small piece or brief extract.

Here’s one from an interview with University of Chicago psychologist Nick Epley on the Plain English with Derek Thompson podcast in an episode titled “‘The Anti-Social Century’: America’s Epidemic of Solitude—and How to Fix It.”

He’s talking about his 15 years of studying the transformative effects of talking to people and taking interest in them, from strangers on the bus to deep conversations with friends. We think strangers don’t want to be talked to, but it makes them happier when we do. We think we’ll feel better by not interacting. We’re wrong, even if we’re introverts! Making the wrong choice and keeping to ourselves literally dozens of times a day adds up.

Thompson: “Do you come away from these studies thinking that your natural inclination to keep to yourself should maybe be exploded a little bit and you should open yourself up to people.”

Epley: “So there's no research that I've ever read about or been involved in that's changed the way I've lived my life more than this. … I've now seen 10,000 data points showing these gaps between our pessimistic expectations about what happens when I reach out and take a genuine interest in you and reach out and try to connect to you in a positive meaningful way with good intent. …I've seen so many data points at this point about the size of that gap. that it has changed the way I live my life from top to bottom.”

Photo by Luke Michael on Unsplash.

Sermon Recap: “How to Build the Deep Relationships You're Craving” (Philippians 2:12-30)

After the Vikings' recent playoff loss, quarterback Sam Darnold's focus wasn't on the defeat's disappointment, the quality of his play, or his next contract but on the bonds with his teammates. This mirrors Paul's message to the Philippian church about creating lasting community connections. Just as strong teams develop deep camaraderie through shared mission, the church thrives when we build authentic relationships centered on Christ.

We can discern four essential practices for creating close bonds and camaraderie with fellow believers.

First, we need to work out what following God means in practical ways.

"Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose." (Philippians 2:12-13)

Paul couldn’t be with the Christians in Philippi to guide them and instruct them. They needed to work out for themselves what following Christ in obedience looks like. When we wrestle together to understand and live out God's calling in our complex world, deep bonds naturally form.

Second, we need to build up instead of tearing down.

"Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people." (Philippians 2:14-15)

Complaining and arguing are community killers, similar to what happened to Israel in the wilderness. When we choose to be builders rather than critics, we create an environment where relationships can flourish. Our unity becomes a powerful witness in a divided world.

Third, we create strong bonds and camaraderie when we prioritize God's mission over self-interest.

"I have no one else like him, who will show genuine concern for your welfare. For everyone looks out for their own interests, not those of Jesus Christ." (Philippians 2:20-21)

Using Timothy as an example, Paul shows that genuine community forms when we stop making church about our personal spiritual consumption. Counter-intuitively, we grow most when we focus on Christ's mission rather than our own spiritual development.

Fourth, camaraderie develops when we put others' interests before our own.

"For he longs for all of you and is distressed because you heard he was ill... Indeed he was ill, and almost died." (Philippians 2:26-27)

Through Epaphroditus's example, we see that true community emerges when we genuinely care more about others' welfare than our own comfort. Even when seriously ill, his primary concern was how his condition would affect others—this other-centered approach creates bonds that last.

Key Truth: True church community isn't built through social connections alone but through side-by-side pursuit of Christ's mission.

Photo by Olga Guryanova on Unsplash.